the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize