I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Randomize
