You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
She's like a pop up book from hell.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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