If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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