Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
