Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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