i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize