My brain says no but my pants say off.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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