I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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