he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Im just a social blackout drinker.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
