OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
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