i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
