so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
