i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Randomize
