Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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