Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Randomize
