Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize