why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
True strength comes from lack of pants
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
