this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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