Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize