gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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