i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
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