YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
