I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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