I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize