Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
