i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
its liver damage thursday
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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