There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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