its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
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