Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
