I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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