i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
