Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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