It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
