Well douche your snatch and let's go!
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
