I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
