if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
