dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
