how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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