is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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