i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
