i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I have feelings that need drinking.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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