im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize