omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
