It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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