Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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