i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Randomize
