All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
