i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize
