oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize