There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
